I have seen a growing trend among some parents lately. There seems to be this pattern developing of “US” using our families as excuses for the things we want to do and for the things we do not want to do.  Here are some examples;

  • “Oh, I’m sorry I would love to come to Second Saturday (that is a serve the community opp) but we have a travel baseball game today.”
  • “Gee, I have to miss church again because there is a major cheer leading competition happening and the coach doesn’t like for us to miss.”
  • “You know, I like going to group but I never get to see my spouse much because of my work schedule.”
  • “Man, if I give this month like we usually do then we won’t have that extra vacation money this summer.”
  • “Sorry, I would love to come help you move but we have had this family thing planned forever.”
  • “Wow, knew you were in the hospital but we had a huge HW assignment due tomorrow for the kids.”
  • “Dang, I didn’t know it was so bad for you, I have been wrapped up in the home makeover thing, you know my spouse wants it done like now.”

Alright so before you get peeved at me I have been guilty of all of the above.  So number one I aint judging you.  Let’s just say I have noticed that you and I have some similarities. :)

If you know me then you know this is what I consider family fun!

We love to use our families as excuses for the things we would rather not do.  I mean, let’s face it, when we rally around the call of family time who is going to question us right?  In a world that seems so on the brink of destruction all the time it is important for families to stick together right?

I agree with you.  We need to spend time with our families but spending time with them does not automatically make them better off for it.  That’s a lie.  You can hurt your family just as much as the world when you use them as the excuse.  How?

Do you know what all the things listed above have in common?  IT’S ALL ABOUT ‘YOU’.  That’s right, whether it’s about getting what you want or showing your kids that what they want to do always trumps what is good and what should be done.  If we keep up with these patterns we will have a generation of people that always look to themselves first for their own well being instead of to God. Um, if you have been in church long enough you know how that’s going to end.

Listen sometimes it is the right thing to do to fight for family time.  It’s ok (can’t believe I am saying this) to miss church every so often but it should not be the default thing to do.  It’s ok to say no to serving someone else because you had something planned.  That’s fine BUT it should not be that way all the time.  As a matter of fact it shouldn’t happen that much at all.  If our time is being taken from us and we have to cut good things out always so we can do the family things then we are probably not managing our time well or it’s time to scale down and get a different job.

Let me leave you with this thought.  I want to show you how Jesus viewed His family (whom He loved dearly) when it came down to doing everyday life.

19 Now Jesus’ mother and brothers came to see him, but they were not able to get near him because of the crowd. 20 Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to see you.” 21 He replied, “My mother and brothers are those who hear God’s word and put it into practice.”  Luke 8:19-21