31 “Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat.  32 But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail.  And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.”                               Luke 22: 31&32

God has never promised us that we would not face confrontation with the evil one.  That is Satan, Beelzebub, the Prince of Darkness or whatever you wan to call him. (I call him not so nice names myself, actually)  Yes we will encounter the forces of darkness but we learn from scriptures (check out Job) that nothing happens without our God knowing or allowing.  But as we see in this story there is now someone that works for us.

Jesus, actually admits to Peter what is about to happen.  In this encounter Peter goes on in the next few verses and denies Christ, three times, before the crucifixion.  Mister, “I will never desert you Lord”, was shown his true character.  Yes, it was a failure, but just as in our lives it was one of the most defining and greatest moments in Peter’s life.

Here’s what went down:

• We have now have a High Priest that intercedes on our behalf for strength.  (see Hebrews)
• There is an actual enemy that exists and has it out for you.  Just because you might be a believer does not mean that he will stay away from you.  He’s just got more to prove now.
• Faith is a gift of God, which is supernatural. (not looking for a faith debate but check out John 6)  I believe that if it was dependent on us we would be a lot worse off.
• Going through trials helps you grow and learn about your deficiencies.  Why do you think God would allow it sometimes.
• On the other side of the trials we are called to strengthen our brothers (sisters) so as not to suffer our same fate.

Peter, after this encounter, went on to be the father of the church.  If you want to read about him check out Acts and some of his letters.  He also gets another shot at not denying Christ.

Instead of recanting he asked to be crucified upside down because he was not worthy to be murdered like Christ.  Way to go Peter.  Thanks for strengthening your church brothers…

If you know the story then you understand that dealing with conflict early on is good. OR you might have some, "unfinished business" to contend with...

Here are some “Tips for Preventing Conflict” strategies, for groups, that my buddy Alan came up with. By the way if you’re a group leader or pastor check out Alan’s website he’s legendary when it comes to group leadership.

Here are the things I would add to this.

• Before speaking with someone, ask yourself the question, “What will this do for me?”  Does it need to really be said or is it s pet peeve of yours?
• If you write better that you speak then write it out ahead of time but still speak in person to the individual.
• The gravity of what needs to be said will work directly in with how  much you are willing to track the person down.  If it’s not worth your time then it’s not worth being said.

Conflict is usually not a pleasant thing to go through but it usually is a good thing to deal with.

It’s like going to the dentist.  You put it off too long and then it’s going to hurt.  You will still walk away in better shape than when you came in but the effects of waiting usually make the situations a lot worse.

Preventative dentistry is the way to go and so is a preventative conflict attitude.

"Stop that!"...(Sorry, had to find a way to fit Monty Python into this blog somewhere.)

This past week at recovery we were going over The Beginning.  As in the actual creation account from Genesis 1 & 2.  There is a ton of theology built up there in just the first two chapters of the Bible.  We begin to see how God intended for the world to be, what could His nature possibly be like, how did He view the things He created and what was His purpose in all of it.

When we ‘go’ there and begin to see what it was like we begin to see how far away from that we have come.  I think we all kind of react a little differently to these facts.  I, for one, get a good dose of reality, understanding how far we have fallen because we have raised ourselves up in place of worship over our God. And if it isn’t ourselves, we worship the things that God has created over God the creator.  What’s that all about?

I wonder how how many of us actually take the time to unplug and observe what God has done.  Creation echos with everything that God is responsible for every day.  Whether you find it in nature outside, or from a close friend’s love, His attributes and goodness are everywhere.  I see it in my 11 month old baby.  She sees me about a tenth of the time Heather sees her but she knows her daddy.  The only thing she wants from me is to pick her up and hold her.  That type of relationship can only be constructed by a master creator.

Funny how my child gets the whole nature of a dependent relationship with the father.  When we as adults run away from our dependency on God. By the way, you were created to be dependent on God. Yep, dependency is actually a good thing that God created.  AND if you aren’t dependent on Him you are dependent on something else.

What or Who are you worshiping today?

If you are interested for the whole deal here is what we taught in Recovery last week.

Redeeming Recovery Week 2 – In the Beginning – Jody May Fall 2010 from Oak Leaf Church on Vimeo.

We just had a season of training new group leaders and had our small groups kickoff. In the middle of all of that and the constant hustle and bustle of life, the beginning of a new school year started for my kids. This is why I haven’t been around here much lately.

So in catching up I am going to lay down a bunch of random stuff on this page that has been in my mind for the last 3 weeks and some of it I will expand on in the future.

• I am always amazed to see how God is working around me. I have seen people in recovery start to realize who they are in Christ.  It energizes me to see the same Spirit of God in both of us. It is truly like having a brother. Weird but awesome!
• My son is a compassionate and loving child while still having the warrior’s heart. I love it. There is a difficult side to this though. He has the strong will of his father. It will be challenging not to squash it but to harness it.
• Heather and I, since moving up here, have had the desire to open up our house for God’s use. It was something that we had no idea what it looked like – but we would look for those opportunities. Sooo in the spirit of intentionality we are having someone move in with us this weekend. Introductions will come later.
• Even when you are busy in life, as a Christian, you are here to do His will. I can’t tell you how many times over the last 2 weeks I have had to stop and help someone process life out. Whether I like it or not it is something that God expects of us. Don’t expect anything in return. Just enjoy the fact that you did something for Him, it’s payment enough.
• We haven’t had TV since last spring. That means we still watch movies from the library or Redbox on the weekends, but that’s it. No on has died and in fact no one misses it?! I would like to challenge those of you with kids to the “3 month no TV challenge.” I will write about how it’s been for me later.
• I like decorating a little too much for a dude. Ask my wife sometimes who gets all the final calls on the house. But I figured it out. It’s not the fact that I love decorating but that 2 of my top 5 strengths are maximizing and arranging. I can’t help but like to do it. That’s my story and I am sticking to it. Want to know what I am talking about? Look HERE.
• I am going to throw down another 18 pallets of sod today. I am a glutton for punishment I think. I am praying for rain in this parched land…

I could go on but the kids are up and on Friday daddy usually makes breakfast. Ooops, just heard momma in the kitchen, gotta go.

In case you are wondering what we are talking about on our Group Recovery Nights, at the House of Rock, here is the first week. It is a general overview of the whole program. In this video, I am simply trying to paint the background from which we can now operate.  It is probably the longest teaching component of this ministry.  Folks did great with being open to us trying to describe why we need Jesus in our recovery.

If you want the note sheets you can email Bonnie Jones, our coordinator, and she can get you what you need.  It’s not too late to sign up.  You get one week’s grace so again let Bonnie know if you would like to join us.

This material was used, under a licensing agreement, with the Village Church in Dallas Texas. Want more info on the program check out their Recovery Page.

Redeeming Recovery Overview – Jody May Fall 2010 from Oak Leaf Church on Vimeo.

This video is of Dana Sutton, who is our Coach for our small groups in this area.  She is going over what is to be expected when people participate in this group process.  She always does a great job in helping people relax while expressing to them that this will require work on their behalf.

Redeeming Recovery – Dana Sutton – Group overview Fall 2010 from Oak Leaf Church on Vimeo.

If you can’t make it this time we will be offering it again in the spring. If you are a member or a regular at Oak Leaf please take a moment and pray for our group leaders in this recovery process.  They are helping people get from where they are to where God wants them to be.

Josh Proctor
Vicki Harris
Bonnie Jones
Jamie Wilhoit
Dana Sutton

Here’s what I sound like on radio in case you were wondering.  Why is it your voice sounds good to you till you play it back. Have a laugh and listen to this…  I will post another one this week.

Dinner time, great for mental health too.

This was a recap from an earlier blog post I wrote about the healthy habit of a family eating together:

“Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be dysfunctional?”

These scenes are from one of my favorite movies, which by the way if it is a half way decent western you have made it to my favorites list..

No big secret here.  If you have scene this flick you would notice that the character Kevin plays is all about intentional living.  Once he has decides to fight this thing out he knows none of the bad guys can survive.  In his own words to his boss, “I aint spending the rest of my life looking over my shoulder!”  Now this is intentionality at it’s finest.

Once you make up your mind DO IT!

I mean I get the whole planning process and taking care of loose ends but geeeesh!  We lose so much momentum when we know we should do something and then we hem and haw about doing it.  Here are some areas where I see us as Christians blow it.

• “Should I lead a small group?”
• “Should I be in a small group?”
• “Should I serve in my church?”
• “Wondering if I should invite my neighbor to church?”
• “Is it safe to ask my co-worker over for dinner?”
• “Should I say something about a friends sin in his/her life?”
• “Maybe I’m the one wrong and I should apologize?”
• “Do I open my mouth at work and possibly risk job loss?”
• “Is it time to talk to my kids about sex yet?”
• “Is now a good time to pray?”

I don’t know what you are currently going through but for 90% of the time I bet for many of you your answer to the above questions need to be “YES”.  And probably if you are the one thinking, “Jody, you don’t understand.” Then you are wrong.  I wrote this for you.  I do understand so stop dragging your feet and DO IT!

The Church (Big C) needs more people that are ready to live with a sense of Intentionality.  You think God is speaking to you about something that’s a good thing?  Great, set your parameters for your prayer time/fasting, make the choice, and GET IT DONE ALREADY!

Not living with intent is like sailing a boat without a rudder.  Lot’s of action but no direction.  Jesus was intent on saving us and did not stray.  I thank God He lived that way.

By the way in the movie, the bad guys die, Kevin lives and gets the girl…

Man! I wish it was this easy.

All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirit.  Proverbs 16:2 ESV

In other words, you might think you are justified in your actions but God knows your motives.

In a time where people are scrutinized for their decisions all day long this little verse brings with it some sense of justice and peace.

We watch the news and see politicians get reamed for their choices.  Local government officials are judged not by outcomes but by proposals of intent.  Neighbors are looked down on for whatever affronts they are causing you.  Your boss earns your condemnation whenever he says something to you that you don’t like.  And let’s not forget what your saying about your spouse behind their back.

In all of these situations we are judging the intent of a man.  This is a hard thing not to do, isn’t it?  I know that I have sinned (wronged) against people a multiple of times by doing this.  Bottom line is this.  I cannot know the intent of some one’s heart, only God does. Whenever I allow my anger to rise up I buy back into that old way of thinking as in, “I can’t believe they are doing this to me!?”  I haven’t even seen the outcome of the decision but I am quick to get all hostile about it.  I am pathetic…

Here’s why I refuse to keep sucking at this.  God says,

“Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven;”  Luke6:37 ESV

I mean all through the scripture we get the same warning.  Don’t do it unless you want the same set of standards placed on you.  You see, that’s where it gets me every time.  God tells me in that little voice in my  head, “Do you really want me holding you to the same set of ridiculous standards you hold everyone else?”  And I’m like, “Um , nope.”  So then I am off and asking for forgiveness….. Again…

At the end of the day God knows the intent of men.  We can’t hide it from Him.  There is also a sense of peace that comes with this.  When you believe that God is truly sovereign (I mean that He is in control of everything and we will be discussing what you think is free will in the future) that everything works for and according to His purposes.  You will also find that fact a couple of more times in the same chapter 16 of Proverbs where we find that verse at the top of the page.

Must be a reason why God had it written that way.  Probably to get us to stop being a cry baby about perceived wrongs because He might have even wanted it that way.  DOH! Now how’s that make you feel?  Yep, there’s something to be said about being slow to anger…

Liked this pic from Edinborough, Scotland - I will visit the homeland someday.

Know when to take a break. Everyone gets busy in their lives.  Sometimes people don’t want to come over and just do another Bible study.  I think many of us would just love to hang out with fellow believers and try to figure out this thing we call life.  Put your feelers out.  If you have a bunch of tired-looking folks, don’t be afraid to break away from the plans.  Care for your peeps by ministering through the lost act of fellowship.

Here’s a working definition of fellowship:

Things to keep in mind when attempting to fellowship with your people:

• Do it over food.  Food is the recognized drug of choice to help people feel better.  There ain’t (I know it’s not a proper word but I like it) nothing like getting together and talking over food.  It will help raise your serotonin levels while you share about your life.
• Add games when you can.  We don’t do this enough in our world.  Life is already too serious.  Laughing and playing together allows people to see the  common interests in their lives.
• Make sure the environment is comfortable.  Yeah, I know we’re not suppose to care what the house looks like but others do.  During this time of hanging out you don’t want people checking out your house which makes them and you uncomfortable.  If that’s not an option pick neutral territory.
• You can combine Bible study and food.  It’s two great tastes that taste great together. (I didn’t steal that).
• Put it on the calendar, and make it a regular occurrence, so that people will look forward to it.

God reveals Himself to others through scriptures AND through relationships.  Safe Christian relationships are the practice field for the mission field in the real world.  These relationships are developed through purposeful fellowship times.  Take the time to plan and respond to the needs of your group.

“Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts,”      Acts 2:46 NIV

If you know anything about the early church – this was one of the few things they got to enjoy…the fellowship with other believers.

Know when to shut up. – As an ex-teacher I know that there is always the potential for a group leader to go rambling off on something they have learned or experienced.  I still lead groups and it is always a constant struggle for me to shut up and practice listening.  If we practice more listening and less talking we will find the common beliefs within the group and possibly help someone.  I’m not saying don’t share, just be conscious that group growth comes from group talk not leader talk.

Here’s what I mean.

• When you are introducing a lesson that’s your time to set up the conversation for the day.  Get what you need to say out of the way.  Then, sit back and listen.
• Practice asking open ended questions.  That means questions that produce conversation; “What do you think about that?”  “When has this happened to you before?”  “Where do you see this happening in your life?” etc.  We need to ‘see’ the thought processes.
• Notice how others react.  Did you see someone smile?  Was Betty Lou raising an eyebrow? Why does John keep checking his watch every time his wife talks?  This is another great way to get others involved in discussion.  Ask them what those actions mean.  Just be prepared for this is when it usually starts to get interesting.

At the end of a good group time most of the people should have felt like they contributed to the time.  As a leader it is our job to be the facilitator of these moments of biblical community.  People will grow closer to each other, which is what we want, when they get the opportunity to talk to each other in sincere ways.

Warning though…  This is does lead to confrontation sometimes.  That’s ok.  Confrontation is what causes us to doubt what we have always believed.  This opens us up to new ways of looking at sin in our lives.

This does not happen when we teach all the time.  Our verbal diarrhea let’s people hide behind their mask of quietness.

Practicing the art of knowing when to speak and knowing when to shut up takes time.  It can be frustrating (especially for us know it all people) but like any skill you will get better with time.

By the way.  If you need an outlet for teaching/talking try blogging.  Why do you think I am writing this?